Climax

What mommy never told you is how hard communication would be. What mommy never told you is how much you would grow apart from her...from everyone. What mommy never told you is that fairy's don't exist, and you will never save the world.

I can pretend all I want, but I still always be this person. Feelings I can't control, emotions I'll never understand, the loneliness I'll always have.

What I can never tell you is what I really need. Not because I can't speak, not because I don't know the words, but out of sheer fear. Fear I won't be heard. Fear so drilled and set deep inside, planted as a tiny seed before I even learned to walk.

Having Aspergers mostly means, that even if you find that one person...that one person who you love more than anything ever...anything thing you ever thought possible...and thing that reason found entirely improbable...it still won't have the chance that it will actually work.

It's accepting that anything you have ever loved will be a short term story. A chapter. You will have that one amazing chapter, the chapter that defines everything, every part of who you are. The chapter that makes you feel everything you have never felt, things you didn't know you could, parts you didn't know you had. The chapter will be the best read, it will be heart wrenching, it will be memorizing. But with every chapter comes an end, even if you are willing to keep writing or not, but it won't get better than this.