Monday, October 8, 2012

Behaviors Dream Board

You know The Secret? Where you post all of your goals and aspirations on a board, and eventually, if you want it enough, everything comes true. Just by the cosmic evolution of humanity.

Well on my drive home tonight, I was thinking maybe, just maybe, if I sat here and typed out all the things I wanted to be in life, someday, somehow it would happen. One wise person once told me, that everything I stress about and have to do, to write it all down and stop letting it kill my brain cells worrying about everything all day. So I took a few minutes, and wrote down everything I had to do, everything that was stressing me out. Once I did that, everything instantly went from my head, to the document, and just like that all the stress fell away.

Now I'm going down this roll, I'm going to post all the things I don't want to be. Hopefully, that will solve my problems of being afraid to be a bad person. So here we go.

I want:
To be unafraid to go out in public and speak with people
To be a loving, caring, compassionate person
To be good at my job
To have the patience to deal with people that frustrate me
To be able to fall asleep at night
To stop yelling at people just because I'm mad
To stop getting mad at people for stupid reasons
To spend more time out doing things than in my bedroom
Somehow make people like me and want to be my friend
Learn how to get to know someone
Gain the confidence I know I have somewhere in me
To be able to communicate with the people I love correctly
To be able to do everything on my own
To solve everyones problems
For everyone to let me solve their problems
To finnish school without panic attacks
To learn to love without conditions

To be able to learn without filters or boundaries
Learn to take criticism

I don't want:
To be selfish the rest of my life
To hurt other people by my selfishness
To be just like my family
To end up alone because no one can deal with me for long
People to hate me
People to feel unloved
People to suffer because of me
People to think I did more bad than good
To go nowhere in life
My children to hate me because I didn't want to learn how to make them happy
To be a bitter old person because I hate what I did with my life
To feel like I wasted any time
People to think I'm someone I'm not
To be a liar
An average life

I'm sure there is more. But I just sat here for an hour and couldn't think of anything else. So maybe I'll be adding more to it later.